I’ve been meaning to write this post about my story for quite some time.
So here it goes.
The past few months I’ve met so many amazing men and women through my press trips and conferences across the country. It’s been such an incredible experience- traveling and bonding with others from Alaska to Maine who have had similar experiences to me- they’ve experienced something that’s been life altering.
And that’s where it all starts.
It only takes one.
Just one person to connect with to feel like you’re not alone in the world.
Every party I attend, every dinner I’m invited to, every entertaining extravaganza whether it be a BBQ or a wedding I’m always the odd gal that can’t enjoy the decadent food and alcohol. But I’m okay with that. Actually I’m more than okay with that- I’ve learned to love what makes me different and not be embarrassed anymore.
Why?
Well, simply because life is too darn short.
And so when I’m at a party and someone makes a snarky comment about how I’m not eating or how I stand out for not being able to enjoy the event- I simply just smile because they just don’t get it.
And it wasn’t until last month when I met my soul mate friend who has dealt with stomach woes and pain her entire life- that I realized I’m not alone.
There are so many other women out there dealing with the same situation but they’re embarrassed and too scared to talk about it. Why is that?
Why do so many women feel like there is something wrong with them when it’s simply how they were born? Why do they try to hide the fact that they can’t eat the foods everyone else can or drink the alcohol everyone else can?
Why?
Do they want to feel included? Are they embarrassed? Are they scared of what others will think?
Well, I hope not. Because feeling included, being embarrassed and worrying about what others think is for high school- and golly gee- we are far beyond high school, aren’t we?
I’ve learned not to stress about what others think about me when I eat before I go out to dinner with friends or bring my own food to weddings and events. I decided a long time ago that I’ve gotta be my own best friend and take care of me- and worry about me.
So, when I travel- there is always a fridge in my hotel room and I am always the woman who asks to speak with the chef before I sit down to dine- I am always carrying food on me even if it’s just while I’m out running errands because I’d rather feel safe munching on an avocado on the subway instead of starving and searching for the nearest Whole Foods Market.
Yes, I am that girl.
And I love it.
Every single part about me I love.
But it wasn’t always like this.
I once yearned to eat a chocolate chip cookie from Magnolia Bakery or sip dirty martini’s at happy hour with my VOGUE colleagues to meet cute Wall Street boys.
I once wished I could be like my colleagues at Ralph Lauren and join them for frozen yogurt during lunchtime at Bloomingdale’s.
I once wished I didn’t have to pack a lunch to my NBA job so that I could eat in the corporate cafeteria and feel cool.
I once wanted to know what it felt like to be able to leave my apartment on a Saturday morning- head down to Soho and eat a burger n’ fries at Felix. Or sip cosmos on the rooftop of the Soho House without having to think ahead about food options that I could eat.
But I don’t anymore.
I don’t really know when this all stopped.
Or when I stopped caring.
Or trying to impress people with my big corporate job and new Prada bag.
Actually I do.
It was last year- when I was told I had 24 hours to live.
And I fought and fought and fought.
And never, ever gave up.
And I did some yoga, some meditating, some reading and a whole lotta thinking. About me, my life and my future.
And I healed.
And that, my friends, is when I realized life is too short to care or worry about anything else.
And I started to focus on me, Amie Jo, and my tiny, simple life in the big (not so simple) city of Manhattan.
And it was then that I knew I was confident to stop proving something.
I stopped feeling like I had to explain myself in every situation when people asked, “Why aren’t you drinking?” “Why can’t you just suck it up and eat the pasta and bread basket?”
They didn’t get it.
Because they could wake up every morning, jump in the shower, grab a coffee at Starbucks and a muffin at Dunkin’ Donuts and hop on the subway to work- then break at 12 for lunch at subway and another break at 3 for frozen yogurt- then hop on over to a bar downtown for nachos and beers until 11PM when they jumped in a cab and headed home to bed – only to start the whole thing over and over again until Friday.
Me, well I’ve never had that routine- nor would I ever want to.
One, I packed lunch everyday when I worked in corporate America because I couldn’t rely on a take-out restaurant for a meal. And two, I have to take my enzymes, vascular pills for my water retention and a whole line up of vitamins and minerals an hour before I eat every morning. And this is just one example. I am not complaining as I am lucky compared to so many others in this world who are on medications or can’t walk or talk or function without machines or a 24 hour nurse.
I am blessed that I am who I am but it also took me awhile to get here.
And that’s simply why I’m writing this post today. Because so many people out there just simply don’t “get it”.
They don’t understand what goes behind the day to day routine of someone else’s life. They don’t understand what it takes to just prepare for a two day road trip or an airplane flight or a week’s worth of food for homemade breakfast, lunch, dinners, snacks and desserts. They don’t understand what it feels like to not be able to eat gluten or dairy or sugar or grains. They don’t. And that’s okay. Because why would they?
I used to be jealous of what others could do, eat and not have to plan ahead- I did.
I wanted to be like my colleagues and friends who could enjoy their day and night without having to worry about where they were going to find a piece of organic chicken and steamed veggies.
But I’m done worrying. I’ve been done for quite some time now.
I’ve learned it’s all about being prepared- staying prepared and making sure you’ve always got a lil’ something to hold yourself over just in case the unexpected happens.
And for those who don’t get it. Don’t hate them. Don’t get upset if others make you feel ‘out of the loop’ or feel like you’re not a part of the group because seriously- you know your body better than anyone else and you need to take charge of you and your body now and every day in the future. Because without supporting yourself- there’s nothing.
That’s right.
So, the next time someone asks you, “Why are you lame and not going out to the bars?” or “Why can’t you just have a cheeseburger and beer and deal with a stomach ache?” Just smile and don’t get upset or frustrated because there are many of us out there that deal with these comments and many of us who are confident enough to not let them bother us.
Life is simply just too short.
And if eating a cheeseburger and drinking a beer is going to make you sick for days in bed- is it really worth those 20 minutes of feeling ‘cool’ and fitting in?
I didn’t think so.
Think of it like this…everyday we are given a handful of change. Everything we do takes a nickel, dime, penny or quarter until we are left with nothing and exhausted by the day’s end.
What do I mean by this? Well, picture this scenario of a day I might have. You wake up in the morning with a stomach ache and it takes (a quarter) to get out of bed and (another quarter) just to shower, along with a (few dimes) to get yourself dressed and take your medicine (that’s a quarter) then you make your homemade breakfast (another quarter) but you’re in so much pain with your stomach and running to the bathroom that you realize you are late for work and already exhausted. Then you walk to the subway (a dime) and go to work (lots of quarters) and make your lunch in the corporate kitchen (some more quarters) then head home on the subway (a dime) to make your homemade dinner (another quarter) and relax in front of the television before all of your change is gone.
The point of this handful of change is that you can think of each penny, nickel, dime and quarter as a piece of energy to your day. Many people wake up and carry on with their days and don’t use any change because they have no food allergies or implications – while others are faced with a few twists and turns that can be exhausting and add up throughout each day. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about- actually you should be proud. But just remember, when it’s 6PM and your friends are asking you to go out drinking or to a bar and you’re just not feeling it- don’t worry- look to your change and see how much you have left for your energy for that day. If you have some change left and you feel you wanna go out- go for it and have fun even if you’re not drinking (I love getting a seltzer with lime). If not, save your change (your nighttime energy) and put it towards making a bubble bath, reading a book and doing a face mask- then tuck yourself into a cozy bed.
Because it’s the little things in life that will keep you happy.
And life, to me, is all about being happy with yourself.
I did it and so can you.
So, keep that chin up and keep smilin’.
Your day is coming.
Your day is truly coming.
xox
This my friends, is the start of my book…I’ve decided to write a book/cookbook to inspire others and here I go…
I know it isn’t just a coincidence that I came across this post. I have found out the consequences of glutens for me and also suspect dairy is a problem for me. I sat here in tears this morning over the whole situation. Last night I told myself that I would just rather not ever eat anything again. It’s the planning that is so hard. I used to love to cook, now I hate it. I really need to learn how to live this gluten free/dairy free/sugar free life without giving up every week. You are an inspiration and I feel like meeting you here will help me a lot. God Bless you dear. I too have issues of forgiveness I am going through and you have encouraged me to take the time to deal with past issues and renew my love for cooking in a healthier way.
Thank you so much; you are so kind! I love hearing from you and I am so happy to hear from you. Stay positive; you CAN do it! xoxo Sending you a HUGE hug from NYC. xooxoxx
A friend of mine just posted your gift card giveaway on her Facebook page and I’m so glad she did! I’ve been reading all of your blog posts and am so happy to have found you. I have severe migraines that got so bad they were happening every day and all my doctor did was try more medication -ugh. On elimination diet right now – no problem with eggs but definitely dairy – next up is introducing gluten back in but I already know the answer! 🙁
Thank you SO much for sharing your journey!
Love this article!
What a beautiful post, Amie. Can’t wait for the book to come out – your story heals + inspires. Looking forward to collaborating. xo
Thank you so much Katie; so great to hear from you! Excited to work with you too! oxx
Amazing and a blessing that somehow I came across you on Facebook. Im just perusing through your website and loved this story you so openly shared. I m 49 years old and trying to “clean up” my world. I too was diagnosed with Lyme disease, a thyroid disease – the doctors are still not sure of mine, I go from hypo to hyper- and a few more. So all of these issues interrupted my life . Feeling completely overwhelmed I stuck my head in the sand! I am slowly converting to a cleaner diet and I now feel that with the discovery of your site it can be done!!! So, thank you so much.
Thank you Donna!!! Hugs. Xxxooo
I stumbled upon your site in search for some recipes. I had no idea I would end up ready such an uplifting story of hope. I was diagnosed with bipolar in 2008 (I was 31) after an extremely scary manic episode and hospitalization. I hadnt had any symptoms of this mental illness my entire life. This happened 14 mths after my daughter was born. I was hospitalized for 10 days prior to her birth because of complications I was given large quantities of antibiotics.
When I left the mental hospital on numerous meds and couldnt walk to my mailbox without assistance. It has been a battle to get to where i am today. I’ve been through numerous Psychiatrists and numerous Counselors. It has been a long road with many ups and downs. I am now only on 2 meds and hopeful those will be eliminated soon with the help of my wonderful Naturopathic doctor. She has helped give me my life back.
I can relate greatly to your struggles in the past and am on a journey myself to where you are today. Thank you for the inspirational story. You website is a wonderful resource that I look forward to sharing with many others.
Jennifer,
YOU are amazing!!! I loved hearing your story and I am SO happy for you. Keep your head up. I still deal with ups and downs with my health- I just got over a 4 month stomach infection and slowly working back to healing my gut and thyroid so I know how hard it is to keeping going but you have to stay positive and know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It amazes me how some people can eat whatever they want and not get sick when I have a bowl of veggies and am doubled over in pain. I’m still learning what works for me and it’s a long road but there is sunshine at the end, darling!
LOVED hearing from you; keep that head up and hope to hear from you again soon. Keep me posted on how fabulous you are doing.
xoxo
Hugs from me to you—wherever you are!
Hi Amie, i just found you through another site, and glad I did! what a wonderful touching story, looking forward to your book and all the wonderfulness it will bring to all. I am not a chef, but I make fermented foods/teach others the importance of adding them to their diets to help restore their inner ecology, from the harm done by consuming the SAD (standard american diet) of processed foods/sugars! I would love the opportunity to meet you one day, if you have workshops/events I would like to donate my Cultured Vegetables please let me know and allow me enough time to ferment them! ! Let food be thy medicine! In good health, Dulce
Thank you so much Dulce; great to hear from you. Thank you for your comment. I would love to meet you, as well. I teach many workshops and classes so please feel free to email me at thehealthyaple@gmail.com as I’d love to try your products.
Thank you; have a great night!
It’s great to begin! So happy for you. I had some great ideas for you about this!
Awe; you are so great Kir! I love you; can’t wait to hear your ideas. Tea and chat next week for sure. xoox MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Wow. Just wow. I can not begin to say how grateful I am for this post. I am just coming to terms with Hashimotos and after being diagnosed comes all the processing and not being able to be the girl who used to eat and drink along with everyone else and having to explain it to people who DO NOT GET IT. No matter how hard you try! And I was starting to struggle with the explaining and figured I just would stop and focus on me, which in itself is hard but I felt deep down was the right thing to do, so it’s strengthening to hear I’m not alone! Thank you so much! Xxx
Thank you so much Lemonie; so nice to hear from you! You are never alone; keep your head up and stay positive. Sending you a HUGE hug. xoxo
had no idea you were writing this when we last spoke! I can’t wait for this book to be out, it makes me feel like it’s not just us!
Thanks Nicole! So happy to hear from you; your support means so much to me and I am so happy for you and all you are doing. Have a wonderful Sunday night and hope you are in NYC soon to get a big hug!
ox
Aimee, I had no idea this was your story. I so admire your courage and strength! Can’t wait to read your book. I met you at BlogHer Food in Seattle. Wishing you all the best Aimee!
Awe; you are so kind! Thank you so very much Karista. So happy to hear from you and OF COURSE I remember you from Seattle! So delighted to have your support and thank you for taking the time to read this post.
xox
Sending you HUGE HUGS!
Amie, I can’t wait to read your book! Although we’ve chatted a bit about it, this blog post has given me a little more insight into your personal experience with food, and I think you’re wonderful in so many ways… for your growth, your strength and for inspiring others! (Including me… Although I don’t share the food issues, I am certainly inspired by your dishes and your way of life). xo
Awe thank you so muchMarian! You just made my day and I greatly appreciate your support and am so happy we met in Seattle this summer. You are amazing! Xxoo
You are my hero & always will be–can’t wait for that wonderful book!
Love you!
Mom, you just made me cry. Thank you for your very first comment on my blog. I love you; your support means everything to me! Xxo
Love reading your words, Amie! When I had to be very restrictive with my diet because of frequent upset stomach I had many of the same feelings and grew accustomed to ignoring peoples’ comments. You will be very inspirational to others through your new book 🙂
p.s. How many ‘soul mate friends’ do you have, anyway? I get the feeling it’s everyone you meet! You are just that lovable 🙂
Awe; I love you darling! You are one of my true sole mates and I loved seeing you in Seattle but I wish I saw you more often. Kinda funny that we just met a year ago this week in San Diego at BlogHer…and we’ve had some great times since at BlogHer Food and Expo West. I love spending time with you and Lucy and hope to see you again soon. Happy August. Sending you a big hug; thank you for all of your support. xoxo
Sending you a big hug too!! xoox
Beautiful and powerful, Amie! I love this post so very much and I am so happy for you that you’ve let go of those feelings and are thriving in every sense now! 🙂 I talk about this stage in my Grieving Gluten post. Off to share, to demonstrate through your personal story that we all can reach that sixth stage of Embracement.
Thanks so much for sharing with us all and congrats on embarking on writing your first book! xo,
Shirley
Awe; I love you Shirley. Thank you SO much for your comment. You are such a great friend. Thank you darling; have a wonderful afternoon; so delighted to have you as a friend.
xoxo
As always, thank you for sharing your experiences with all of us who suffer from different food allergies / intolerances / issues /ect. You are always inspiring and seem to have just the right words to describe how I often feel! Thank you for those! I do not feel alone, and that is a wonderful feeling! 🙂
I wish you the best of luck with your book and look forward to reading / cooking from it in the future!
Glad you are happy with who you are! That is such a large accomplishment and will make you so very happy as you continue to live your life the way you want to! 🙂
Thank you Katie! You are so kind for leaving me a comment. So glad you don’t feel alone; it is a wonderful feeling! Thank you again Katie; have a wonderful night and hope to hear from you again soon!
xoxo
hi, Amie . I am very happy to come across this website. I am 39yrs. old. Living with Ulceratve Coltis, Diverticulitis, Diabetices,High Pressure,and E.tc. I trying to change my eating habits, and addiction Chemistry. Please can you give me suggestions ? On how i can follow into a heatlthy eating lifestyle as such as yours….Keep up the good Healthy apple Body Life changes. I will LOVE to honor a BOOK from YOU in the near FUTURE. BYE, BYE. TAKE CARE.
Thank you so much for your comment James; so nice to hear from you and I am delighted you came across my website and that you shared your story. Thank you for your support with my book, as well! I’m excited to start writing it and share it with all of you to help others in our situations. I am happy to help you and have you as a client. I hope you are having a good day and feeling great. Stay positive and thank you again!